Mixed Signals or is this Limbo Land

[MHL]

Great day that ended as expected but I was hoping for more, time to go quiet on her and let her do the next call or text or whatever.
Got home from work today about 1:00, did not know if we were going to do something as a family or not. Quickly found out we were and my W was up to it. BTW when I came in she looked awesome!! as usual, this woman does not get out of bed to pee in the middle of the night w/o fixing her hair first. Does not make this any easier, she can walk in to any bar/club whatever and have any man she wants.

We started out going to local sports bar for a late lunch, all of us me, W, D13, S9. Went fine but my W excused herself to wash her hands and was gone a while. D13 knows everything (A#1, A#2, lying all the BS w/ my W) D13 leans over and says "you know she is in there texting" I told D13 there is nothing we can do about it that we have to let it run its course. D13 and I are kinda doing the same DBing, sucks I know, my W is F*@ked in the head. Other than the bathroom thing we had a nice lunch and W and I downed a couple of brews which eased things a little.

Off to the bowling alley, everyone is in a good mood and we bowled 2 sets and W and I downed about 3 or 4 more beers which really loosen things up. A little touching going on and some exchanged glances but that was it. I was ready to take her out back and jump her bones but back to reality.

She stated that she was going out with 2 of our female friends in our neighborhood, both of them with WAH this year one in feb. 09, and the other june 09 wife dropped bomb on me on 7-1-09. There is definitely something in the water out here. My W even said that she did not know why she was telling me. I can tell you why...b/c subconsciously you and i would be going out to eat tonight beeotch. (Venting) I gave the perfect come back response. "Don't worry I will let you take me out to dinner some other time." She smiled. As we were leaving the bowling alley she said how much fun she had and now walking right beside me, I wanted so bad to put my arm around her put resisted the urge. This is hard!!!! I am feeling the connection and I know she is too but I have to let her come to me. Car ride home I put on some Jimmy Buffet, kids hated it but wife and I were singing along happily a little buzzed from the beer.

Got back to the house and she started to say her goodbyes to the children and waited for me to come back downstairs. Again she stated that she had a good time and had a big smile for me. There was the moment when you are supposed to hug but I resisted the urge to move towards her and there was no hug, that was hard!!! Followed her to the garage and she never stopped, but turned to see if I was behind her, I wasn't. I was standing at the door openner button waiting for her to clear the garage door, as soon as she got past I said goodbye and closed the door and turned out the light.

This is the really hard part. I am already feeling the withdraw symptoms. Isn't there some drug I can take to get me through this? I absolutely have to go dark on her until she initiates contact. As they say in the Godfather..."Time to go to the Mattresses", this is war and I am fighting for my Marriage.