AFW has said that her getting counseling if they are to reconcile IS one of his main boundaries. And he's TRYING to enforce that.
That was part of our agreement. I have drafted an email and would like some feedback before I send it. Here it is:
I looked up the policy on Military One Source regarding counseling. Here it is.
Military OneSource has the technology, the procedural infrastructure, and the highly trained staff to ensure that each user is treated confidentially and with respect regardless of rank. However, there are exceptions. Military OneSource consultants have a duty to report family maltreatment (spouse, child, elder abuse), threats of harm to self or others, substance abuse, and illegal activities. These reports are made to the appropriate military and civilian authorities. Since counselors are an extension of Military OneSource, these reporting requirements apply to them as well.
When I had my counseling my counselor told me that nothing got reported to my chain of command. I'm sure if you were using drugs, had murdered someone, or something to that extreme, then yes they would report it.
I have lived up to my end of the bargain. I have taken off OW from facebook. I have taken you out on a date and would like to take you out on more but it appears like you don't want to live up to your end. All I hear from you are comments that indicate otherwise. "I've applied for multiple guard jobs, I want to get my name off the mortgage, I'm not going to pay child support anymore, I should have stayed until daughter turned 18, etc." All these things indicate to me that you are not interested in saving our marriage.
While you've admitted your affair, you seem to be leaving everything up to me to fix. On top of that, while I'm not allowed to have a female friend on Facebook, you have not only friended a single guy, you've been over to his house multiple times and you spent New Year's Eve with him at your apartment. You say you're not interested in him but after everything that's happened do you think that's fair? I don't.
So, either you want to work on us or you don't. I still want you to go to counseling(I'm not asking you to do anything that I haven't done)--that was part of our agreement. If nothing else, it seems like you are still very angry when things don't go your way. If you want to work on our marriage, I need you to do your part.
TOO SUPPLICATING.
As they say in trial court, "Asked and answered." You told your wife (repeatedly) what YOU needed in order to reconcile, and she hasn't done a damned thing.
I hate to say it (again), but the ball's in YOUR court, not hers.
