snodderly: Yes, H behaved himself very well both nights. It was like a new version of the old him. Very comforting and so promising. But, we'll just have to wait and see how things turn out. As for moving forward with the D, part of me wants to be the one to initiate. Having him continually bring it up and not act on it is so frustrating.
peace: I find it really interesting to watch the progression too. Each time there's some movement, it seems pretty significant, and more than the time before. And so far, I can always expect him to retreat after a few steps forward - just like I've read. Hope the retreats become shorter and the progressions become greater!
upside: Yes, I do feel joy in other parts of my life - just try not to with H. My defense mechanisms won't allow me to. It's nice having the friendship with H, but I also fear that it'll end the moment he finds someone else. My H is one of those people who can only be emotionally connected to one person. Even if we are supposedly just friends, I'm sure he'll still feel some kind of guilt that will change the dynamics of our R again. So for now, all I can really do is just enjoy what we have while we have it.
Craving some intimacy (emotional or otherwise). Feeling impatient waiting to see which way things will go with H, but still hoping for things to work out.
