I'm the one that sounds like your husband, stuck in limbo land. What's the difference? We've been going through our stuff for four months after trying counselling last February.
But years? I really don't want to leave a good thing - but I don't feel I'm matched well to my wife, either.
Do I need months to decide - ya. There's a lot of initial emotion and impassess. It took until two weeks ago for my wife to say that she does actually love me. Before that, she said she hadn't loved me for the last 4 years - not a picture that encourages fixing a marriage!
I know my wife is going though terrible stress making me feel absolutely awful because I still love her, I just don't know if I want to be married to her. But you shouldn't need to wait endlessly - someone's 180 might mean changing, or finishing off some paperwork.
