Well up and down tonight. I was upset when H didn't seem at all to notice the undies hanging about, or my hot look as I left. H couldn't be bothered to lift his head out of his magazine (I shouldn't be surprised, he always seemed aloof to me sexually).
However, when I came home from the comedy show, I was in great spirits after laughing all night. Some of my GAL is going to be - more comedy!
We rang in the new year. No kiss, no touching. But we shared a couple of glasses of champagne and laughed and watched some comedy on tv. H was perky and joking around and we had fun. I kept my hands to myself even though I wanted so badly to grab him and kiss him. He's going to have to make a move on me if it ever happens, but it feels like it never will.
However, I must take it as a positive step that we were together for the New Year and having a good time. Hopefully, things will continue in the right direction. Maybe he even secretly noticed how good I looked, although he didn't show it.
Still, it's a far cry from the anger, distance, and pure hell of the last four months. I am so glad we were hanging out, at least as friends. God I hope I can hang in there to see if it goes further. Now that there's a glimmer of hope, I keep wanting things to rush back into romance. Time, patience. Ugh.
