But, to address your other questions. You cannot control any of the effect this will have on your D. That sucks, but it is not something you control.
Which is why I like Coach's way of informing the kids of the D (and what I have told my W will be the case for us). He made Greek tell them and tell them in such a way that she did not indicate he agreed or joined in HER decision. Greek has said this made a big impression on her. At the end of the discussion, Coach looked at his kids and said do you have any questions of me? He was there to support the kids.
Obviously, the kids play a HUGE part in all of this. They were the reason I needed to be able to say I did everything I could to save the M. And one day when they ask me what happened, I want to be able to tell them the truth - they deserve it.
Kids or no kids, I cannot make my W love me or want to work on our M. None of us can. I don't want to get D'd, but what's the alternative? My W has said she does not want to work on our M and has not lifted a finger to end it either. Sound familiar?
