CTH, Bottom line is you are stuck on center. From the sounds of it your R is going no where in a hurry. Problem is marriages don't stay the same, they get better or worse. If it ain't getting better that leaves one reality.
Your challenge is to break the stalemate somehow. Only you know how to do that and you do it based on your own internal boundaries. If dating doesn't fit you so be it. But you have got to find something. For me that is being completely unavailable to my W. Yours may be related to re-organizing the finances to be more in line with your needs.
I think were the discrepancies you are seeing on the board relate to delivery. Their are many ideas as to how to push forward. Some more direct than others but the goal is the same - move the ball. Unfortunately for you and I there are very few, if any success stories of people being nice guys and making their M work.
One thing for certain is you are going to have get out of your comfort zone and create some conflict. That probably is not in your nature if you are a nice guy but you can't move forward without it. Don't get me wrong, conflict does not mean running off in a rage and telling your W she is a crazy b. It means changing the dynamic in the relationship so you have some control.
_________________________ Me-41 W-39 M-15 yrs T-17 yrs D-12 S-9 S-8 B 5/08 S 1/09
