We've discussed the house issue at length. I've complained about the money part of it, yes, but not to her. And even with the amount I'm giving her she's broke all the time.
I'm frustrated now by this board. Exactly what boundaries would you have me put down? We discussed the house issue at length.
You are supposed to focus on yourself, make yourself into the man she fell in love with in the first place. So what I've been trying to do is improve myself physically, financially, emotionally and spiritually.
Bro we're frustrated with you too.
Boundaries are for you as well as her, you control you, what you do and what you would allow her to do to you.
Lets tackle this issue right now, this would seem like an easy one to me:
"...We've discussed the house issue at length. I've complained about the money part of it, yes, but not to her. And even with the amount I'm giving her she's broke all the time."
What money do you give her? I've haven't read the entire thread so I don't know if you're living at home with your wife & kids or not. What money do you give her and why do you give her money?
Money for utility bills? Just take the bills and pay them yourself, that is simple enough. If she complains, you tell her without being afraid of her reaction, "you are broke all the time, you don't know how to manage money and I'm not just going to give you money to burn, this is my decision, if you don't like it then find a way to pay your own bills"
Money for rent or mortgage? Same response as above.
Money for groceries? Give her a set amount that is fair. Although I have to ask the question, why does she need money from you? Does she work? If not, why not? Are the kids very young and not in school that she has to stay at home and watch them? What's up?
So we've covered utility bills, mortgage/rent, groceries... what's left? Gas for the vehicle?
What are you giving money to her for? List the items. List the reasons why. Come up with ways to take care of each.
She's a big girl, let her be an adult but don't let her drain your wallet making mistakes, she either learns or she goes it her own way.
Respond back, based on your answers, I'll get an idea of your mindset here.
