NC - W vanished ...

[P17]

Hey P. Happy new year my friend. Not too much wine I will try another phone call today... After my run. I did not sleep too much. had the weirdest dream about ladybug. We meet up and did something. Cannot remember what. But she had my camera and gave it to me and it showed me pictures of her other life. I can remember 10 or 20 of the pictures. Man what a dodgy dream. Anyways that woke me up and I did not sleep too much after that. Problem was that it was at 2AM... So I was on and off... And just stayed in bed to 10AM.

That is a bit strange. I had a similar dream about W this morning that involved a camera and photos (probably something to do with the fact all I thought about was her photos in the attic last night). I can remember nothing else of the dream other than she looked like the girl I married and not the one that left (the old and new W also looked as well as behaved differently) and we were still separated. Strange. I hate dreaming about her. I have done it a few times this week.

Its funny eh P. How the brain works. A constant overdrive on one issue for months. I can see how some people just shut down and give up. Good thing were strong P. Good thing were strong.

I can completely understand how people cut ties and give up too. I don't see it as strength though. I just see it as some people just can't get their head into the right state to be able to accept the sitch as it is. I don't know if I'm there yet or not. I am a lot stronger than I was when I started this (and my IC concur's).

But yeah, the brain is travelling at a 1000 miles an hour (mine always did so no change there :)) and then you slow it down, relax, analyse, accept, feel, act and all the while stay calm. At least that is the way with me. I haven't felt this clam and relaxed in a long time. In fact, since W left I have removed two medical problems from my life - one of which was psychological and the other they though was medical. Turns out both of them were psychological and the sitch was to blame!

Anyways. I got your back this year. 2010. Cutter.

Good man. I've got yours too. I'm sorry to hear that ladybug is turning up the heat as all of her other efforts to wrestle control haven't worked. I have no doubt though that you'll be able to handle it. Like a lot of WAS's when they resume contact, they don't realise who they are actually dealing with anymore. They will use those tactics that worked on the old LBS that now wash over the new one

P.S. did you get my message on the anwsering machine. Would hate to be calling some one else

I did get your message. Sorry mate I have been literally run off my feet. I'm actually about to go out and get the webcam working for our town's New Year party (I do that every year). For those of you on FB you will be able to see the link I post. I am then off to D's mum's and then the party itself. Maybe see you on the other side of 2010