WAW, live under same roof, and still have sexes.

[tangotake2]

Tango, you will be hearing things from some of us that will be hard to take, but please understand that we want to help you, okay?

Absolutely understood.

......then I believe it is b/c the lawyer has told her that she needs to "show" it more in case she files for custody.

I should have thought as an outsider looking into my situation. I’m locking up to my subjected views and don’t dig deeper or expand them to have a better understanding the logic. Your thoughts have made a lot of senses. No wonder why too many people have cried for your helps.

But, she seems to have you thinking that she is better mother....now.

Yes, she does make me feel that way.

They need to see a firm boundary set in their home for them and their mother. They need to see their father as a strong leader in their family. They need a solid foundation in their lives. You must be that foundation.

Now is more than ever.

You must realize that she is sleeping with OM.

Based on a couple of things and my guts, I don’t feel that way. But everything is possible. The hardly truths have to be dealt with.

I think she will control "you" as long as you get sex with her 2/3 times a week. That is where your weakness lies.....and she knows it and will use that as her leverage to get her way.

I think you will yell at me if I admit that I’m pretty much a starter.

She must see you standing strong & proud.

She will see it and realizes who I am really.

Is the lawyer from a differnt nationality or the same?

He’s different.

I still believe your best avenue to take with busting the A will be through his mother.

I’m with you 100% on this. I have started researching on some public record web sites such as intelius.com to get some info related to the OM’s family.

Don’t know anybody else has any recommendation. Please advise.

I know you do not want MIL hurt from exposing the A, but she is already hurting and this A needs to stop now.

I have thought about going to this route. We are living in a very closed-knitted community. Saving face is a big deal to some of people. I have a list of who I should call and could be a nuclear bomb to my PILs and W. However, it looks like more of me taking revenge to them and could do more harm than good. W can become the worst enemy instead of a co-partner in raising our kids. The damage of exposing W’s A could be well last to my kids’ generation. If I don’t care about her coming back, I’ll go to this route. I’m thinking here.

Wait until we can discuss boundaries, etc. before you decide to take any extreme action.

I’m planning to tell my wife about the 2-week notice of ending her A if she goes out tonight or tomorrow to celebrate New Year. I thought that could be a good time. However, I should wait to have more info in place as you said, so I can pour on W as many cold-water buckets as I can. I need to be patience.

Thanks, Sandi and other for taking time to feed me with supports and advices. This is more than I could ask for.