Hi Deep and H4U, It is good to get some male perspective on this, which affirms what I am working on for myself. At first, it was hard to hear H's complaints because I was the one feeling wronged! But, of course, this whole nightmare has forced me to look at myself, and that i am slowly starting to see has created blessings in the challenges. Last night I was pretty tired from being back at work and not sleeping the night before, but H really wanted to watch a movie and cuddle. Now how could I turn that down? Like many couples, we used to do that, but over time with work and kids etc. we would end up sitting separately. So, I am dog tired today again... but both H and I have our love banks pretty full! (been reading Harley's His Needs Her Needs). So, to me, that is worth it.
I know there will be a balance to maintain of taking care of myself too... and the kids... it's all a delicate balance. But, no matter what our M has to be a priority and I am working on my part.
Deep and H4U - I do understand why your W's have trouble seeing this, though. As women, we feel there is so much demand on us to meet everyone's needs. And, we have more trouble putting work aside at the end of the day than I think a lot of you can. So, when our kids need us (and most of us working moms struggle with guilt that our kids never get enough of us) we give all we can to them and there truly often is not much left over. But, I am starting to realize how much better it is for the kids anyway when mom and dad are doing well in the M and there is a stable home environment. That is the foundation for them, and they need that desperately. So, when I make H a priority, even above them sometimes, I am giving them a gift.
But, of course, this whole nightmare has forced me to look at myself, and that i am slowly starting to see has created blessings in the challenges.
Like many couples, we used to do that, but over time with work and kids etc. we would end up sitting separately. 
