6000 miles away but finaly i see DBing sucess

[JWS123]

Christmas dinner was wonderful and we both had a great time, i thanked her repeatedly for allowing me to be there and I could tell that she wanted me there too. I know she also really enjoyed watching me wrestle with our 4 year old nephew and probable connected to the side of her that always wanted kids with me.

here is a new twist. after finally having an open and honest talk with her mother, she decided to go back to LA and withdraw from school. she is moving home with her mother and will go to school here locally. she will then be around her family and mine, and will be in a more stable environment. i am so happy she has began to talk with her mother and it seems like the ice has really melted in the last few months.

i am sad and fearful that i have to return to Japan for another year. i feel partly like i can keep up my DBing and friends approach from so far away, but being there the first year got me to where i am now so all i can do is hope. i know she has a long road to find her happiness independent of me, and until that is complete its better to have me out of her way.

she still stays that she does not want to be with anyone so i feel a little comfort but have a small irrational fear of some guy sweeping her off her feet and taking her away from me with out me being in the picture, but I am doing fine keeping those fears from really bothering me its just floating around in the back of my head.

I was at a cross roads and ready to walk away and give up. i had DBed and GALed to the point where i found my own life that i really loved and was content to leave the past alone, until i saw her and realized i have never seen a woman more attractive in my eyes and she is everything i want, so just when i thought i was out i am right back in