Explains, pursuers, distancers, underfunctioners, overfunctioners, and blamers.
Then i jumped back to Chapter 3.
with any relationship, kids, wife, customers, anyone, I was always the pursuer, in any argument, wanted to talk things out, express my feelings, feel overly dependent.
my wife was always a distancer....
well something else, if an MLC'er is angry and now I know for a fact she isn't normal...
what you guys have said is right, quit pursuing, there is going to be no reasoning...
i was putting too much faith in my wife and how intelligent,etc. she was before.
i also found out that in May she was not happy and contemplating divorce then, which falls in line with the time line that i shouldn't have written down, that the Denial part of this started 12/12/08.
a distancer in any relationship bails and hides their feelings and runs from stress.
my wife had made up her mind long before anyone had an inkling of what was going to happen.
the stress to her was so overwhelming she was already planning her escape.
kids and i were hosed months before we knew we were hosed.
kid from the skype convo came over to see me he's in town and said hey ayk, didn't know it'd get this bad, but she was talking unhappy and angry at least a month before we went to orlando and she would say all kinds of stuff to the neighbor EA guy.
dang it, didn't really have a fighting chance.
now it makes sense in early July she said don't want to split assets or date again or seperate holidays. She had been talking to someone about the prat falls of divorce for a bit. now it makes sense why her co-workers who had called me said what they had said.
that stinker had been planning her escape and was either looking for someway for it to be saved and couldn't handle the work or justification to pull the trigger and run.
she ran.
wow, learn something knew everyday.
dance of anger, must read....
oh when he was over, he said she was making fun of me to him.she picked him up from airport and been staying over with her and the kids.he's alittle surprised she's acting the way she is to.
just told him, i know what's up, you be her friend, she can't hurt me anymore, i'm having fun and look at the relationship the kids and i have now. if she wants to talk to you about poop talk to her about poop, be her friend, know i'm not angry, it's difficult, but no not angry at her or anyone else, it is what it is.
