Re: the unauthorized withdrawal, she said two different things about it when she returned:
1. "I did that just to piss you off!" (because I've been transferring money)
2. "Oh that was a mistake. I was joking with the teller and she thought I wanted her to really take the money out. It'll get put back tomorrow."
I wonder if my leverage wanes if I don't file quickly. I mean, the longer I have her back in the house (isn't that insane to have to say about your wife?!) the more it seems to look like she wants to be here. She was gone for about a month, heard from her maybe twice a week.
Talk to your attorney tomorrow. If you decide to pursue it as a criminal matter, you probably will want to act quickly. I bet the teller will hang her out to dry if questioned under oath.
As far as her wanting to be in the house...either she's given up dbag and wants to work on your marriage, or she hasn't. If she hasn't, then she will come and go as she pleases, stay out late, etc. You can document those things. It may even be worthwhile to get a P.I. to get some photos--your attorney can advise you about this. If she has, she should be contrite and be asking you what it will take to make it work for you. Do not have sex with her! Not only does that expose you to whatever diseases dbag may have, but you don't want to imply that she is welcome back into the marriage.
I agree that it's crazy to be so distrustful of your own wife. You have no choice at this point. She has to prove her true intentions. As far as seeking out Puppy and Coach, the face icon in the upper left corner of any of there posts shows when they are online. Find there most recent post and reply to it.
Does it give her what she wants if I file? Does it allow her to make me the bad guy?
Why do you care? You are going to do what's right for the mini-Norses and for Norse (in that order). You know that you're not the bad guy. Don't give her any power that's not due.
Talked to my attorney five minutes ago. He seems on top of things, so that's good. His advice to me:
-per wife's lawyer, they are not rushing to file -my chances for "busting" the affair obviously improve over time, and the way to buy time is to simply take this process slowly. -filing on my end would be counterproductive, since all the money to pay the attorney's essentially comes out of my pocket anyway -I shouldn't do ANYTHING that would cause her to lose her job, thus no talking to people at bank and/or ex-wife of Mr Dbag. So I'm glad I've waited on those. -only things I should document are things that relate to her "hurting" kids, i.e., her lawyer informed her that she should NOT have the kids around mr dbag. If she breaks that, I am to notify my lawyer, and he said her lawyer will be pissed and probably drop her. -I should open new accounts at a bank that my wife does NOT work at and sleep with higher ups at. lol -Ive asked my lawyer to relay to her lawyer that I would like the affair ended. She has a right to deny that, but I thought it was nice to add that touch. -my focus right now should be to complete the worksheets on the financials that they gave us.
I told my lawyer that I want to delay, and take things nice and slow. I've gotta trust that time will be my ally here, even though I'm scared of relying solely on that.
She wants everything to move along quickly and smoothly.
So drag it out and make it rocky.
Time to set some boundaries in your home.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Talked to my attorney five minutes ago. He seems on top of things, so that's good. His advice to me:
-per wife's lawyer, they are not rushing to file -my chances for "busting" the affair obviously improve over time, and the way to buy time is to simply take this process slowly. -filing on my end would be counterproductive, since all the money to pay the attorney's essentially comes out of my pocket anyway -I shouldn't do ANYTHING that would cause her to lose her job, thus no talking to people at bank and/or ex-wife of Mr Dbag. So I'm glad I've waited on those. -only things I should document are things that relate to her "hurting" kids, i.e., her lawyer informed her that she should NOT have the kids around mr dbag. If she breaks that, I am to notify my lawyer, and he said her lawyer will be pissed and probably drop her. -I should open new accounts at a bank that my wife does NOT work at and sleep with higher ups at. lol -Ive asked my lawyer to relay to her lawyer that I would like the affair ended. She has a right to deny that, but I thought it was nice to add that touch. -my focus right now should be to complete the worksheets on the financials that they gave us.
I told my lawyer that I want to delay, and take things nice and slow. I've gotta trust that time will be my ally here, even though I'm scared of relying solely on that.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
