Either way, a better future starts with a better career path.
It can, but a better future starts with a change of attitude, beliefs and thoughts first.
Quote:
I can't seem to let go of the feelings I have for her no matter how real the situation is that I am looking at.
In the words of one Yoda: "That is why you fail.."
Quote:
For me to not care any longer would mean for me to also not care about what my kids want, need and is best for them which is an intact family that is healed and fixed.
No, that is NOT what your kids need, they need a strong and healed father, no matter what the family situation. You are projecting onto your kids, your feelings and wants. In addition, you still think you can CONTROL this situation, and you can not, and that is what is bothering you, and fear of the future. When you let both of those go, you can then start to move forward.
Quote:
if someone can get over more than one A and still forgive and be willing to do what it takes reconcile, isn't it at least worth giving that person another shot to see if things can be fixed?
See, this here is still about control. You can get over the A's, but you don't get to control whether or not your STBXW will EVER want to reconcile. You don't even get to decide if it's worth giving it another shot yet, nor if anything can be 'fixed.'
There is nothing to be fixed currently, but yourself.
Until you get to the point above that you not only understand it, but then accept it, and then live it daily, you won't ever get to make these decisions, because you do not control them one iota.
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
