I have reviewed emails, facebook(she doen't know this one), webrowser, and telephone. I have also kept sureptitious tabs on her whereabouts. In the last couple of weeks she hasn't had any opportunities to see him. If I even suspected contact(and my eyes are wide open now) I would have exposed it. I have no fear of doing so and she knows it. Also, there is her behavior. She is miserable. If she was seeing him, she would be much, much happier.
I tend to agree. "GOOD = BAD" and vice-versa at this point, regarding her moods. She's most likely in withdrawal, and there's not much you can do during this time if she doesn't express a willingness to work on the marriage.
If she maintains NC, she will slowly begin to come out of this funk in the next few weeks, although it's going to take months before she's completely over the addiction. And if she re-initiates (or allows) and contact with him, her "clock" is going to reset to 0:00.
