Well, made it through Christmas. I was good most of Christmas day and was really enjoing myself until the evening. Then everything kind of hit and I started thinking to much. A week or so prior to Christmas I had told the W the kids would be available to see her on Christmas day if she wanted. She told me she would think about it but that she did not want to make any concrete plans. In any case, I did not pursue the issue. She called that day but that was it. I do not know how she does it.
For a couple of months I did not post here becuase I was in a pretty good place. Now I feel like I have not gained any ground and that bums me out. The W has moved on and started a new life. I am trying to do the same but it has been hard.
I have decided to limit my time with her as much as possible. I am not initiating any conversation and I am trying to make the kid exchange as brief as possible. My intent is to be friendly but not friends. Anthing else would be to hard a this point in time.
There have been no signs of remorse or mixed feelings so at this point in time BD is probably a waste of time.
