Bridgestone: all good points. My role is I have not met her emotional needs for a long time. She didn't meet mine either and it has always been a chicken and egg issue as to whose love bank was empty first. Since I'm here and don't have the abuse baggage she does I see it as my obligation and desire to right the course of the M and I will step up. You are spot on about her being hypervigilant about protecting her heart due to her abuse background.
I like your point about "Step up. Be the rock with boundaries, yet be her soft place to land." That's the part I'm stuggling with. On one hand I hear I need to be stong and work on improving me by GAL and 180 but that seems kind of opposite of being the soft place for her to land and be her safe and compassionate leader. Can you offer specific suggestions how I can do both?
