Haven't checked in since Christmas Eve.....Been pretty busy with the boys.....The night went rather well....She was not feeling well, but we did get along fairly well....It was just nice for all of us to be there together......
After the boys went to bed, we got all there presents out and did Santa.....We talked some about years past and actually had a nice time.
Afterwards, we had a couple of drinks and sat on the couch and watched tv......She asked me was I still talking to the lady I had been seeing.....I told her we still talked some, but right now that was it.....She stated she still talked to her OM and didn't understand why I was not talking to my friend some....I told her that it hurt my friend to talk alot and that I didn't want to make her think anything had changed between us....I really don't want to hurt this woman anymore.....
At one point, I came back in the room and sat beside her on the couch.....She leaned in and then pulled back and said don't get too close.....I asked what she meant by that....She said we need to learn how to talk to each other without any physical stuff...I think I understand where she is coming from....We talked for another hour or so and then I went home......She did bring up a couple of R things and we talked about it....She seems to be coming around some, but I know not to really pressure her....
Went back over Christmas morning and stayed for awhile.....Helped boys with some of the things they got and then left.....We got along well....
Talked to her yesterday......She called about her sister's ex-husband's father dying....We were dicussing arrangemnts and she said she did not think anything was happening today....She then said OM was coming over and they were going to eat and then to a movie....Kinda hit me hard, but I did not re-act to it.....Just kept up conversation and she wanted to stay on phone.....She is noticing some changes I have made and commented on them.....The main one was that I seem calmer now and don't let things bother me....I have changed alot and would like for this to work, but OM has got to be out of the picture.....
I guess I am just looking for a little encouragement.....She has made such a big deal to people that she is getting out of that relationship.....She just can't seem to cut all ties......I know I just need to keep working on me and I can't control what she does......All I can do is be the man she loved and wanted at one time.....Maybe she will see that and want to come back....Maybe she won't......Just kinda down today and wanted some advice...
