My UFO (unbelievably fabulous observations)

[hoosiermama]

Hi, Andabelle, NCB and goldey!

Merry Christmas to y'all, too. December 25 is only the FIRST day of Christmas, right?

After a perfectly miserable, wallowing-in-crap, pathetic, pity party at Thanksgiving, it seems I got it out of my system. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day were great. Nothing remarkable, nothing earth-shattering or euphoric or intense. But really warm and pleasant and...happy.

Christmas Eve D13 was with H's family and had a blast with her cousins and aunts and uncles--and no OW anywhere, so she was thrilled. She arrived home about 11 pm flying high and just about exhausted me with her energy and joy--just normal young-teen Christmas stuff, which otherwise I'd take for granted! I spent the evening at Mass at 5 pm, followed by a dinner with 5 others including my priest-friend who's been such a blessing and several hot Hispanic young men. Don't be callin' me a cougar--most were gay Catholic seminarians! Had a great--and irreverent--evening together! Midway thru the evening I realized I felt completely content and at peace--not a smidge of emptiness or grief. And that was truly a wonderful feeling.

Christmas Day D13 slept in, and got up to open her gifts and we relaxed and ate all day long. It was very nice. Again, no feeling of longing for anything different for the day.

I will admit here that I had a couple of very difficult days earlier in the week, never did get a tree or do much decorating--but that is not a new thing for me. Never a big fan of Christmas, and D13 didn't seem to mind much at all. It isn't about the tree and lights and stuff--it's about being together and celebrating the birth of Jesus, and that we did.

Also did some nice reconnection with a friend I thought had become estranged--turns out it was my email being screwy, and we had a very good chat after notes on fb (take that, email!)

At this point, not looking ahead to wonder what next Christmas will bring, not looking for reasons to be feeling incomplete--just enjoying my daughter and having some leisure time together. This is a nice space to inhabit for once.