NC - W vanished ...

[newmama]

I wonder if you are right about the unknown number...if it was W. WHy doesn't she just drop off the gift at your door? Why call you? Why do you think? I could see it as being she is sick of going through IM and hoped she could just call you directly by catching you off guard with the blocked number. Maybe she was hoping to wish you a Merry Christmas too?

In my thread, you talked about the fact that NC might make it easier for some WSs who don't like conflict like your W to carry on without their A because they think you have moved on and on the other hand they don't want to fight for the M if they think you are done with it.

The thing about it is that I look back to my dating days; if I wanted to date someone and hadn't heard from them, I did not give up on contacting them. But the same happened in reverse...the guys that wanted to date me persisted on calling even if I didn't return a call (was busy or something--not playing games). If I flat out said "sorry, it's not working out" they stopped calling. Same for me if the guy said it to me.

So when NC is arranged with either a letter explaining the conditions for contact (reconcile or end the relationship) or no letter at all, this seems to be the same message as someone just not returning your call. If NC was arranged after BS said "I am done. Idon't want to hear from you ever again." Then I could see the conflict avoidant/weak WS thinking "okay, the BS really is over me. I won't ever bother going back or asking to R."