Thanks Nut. I've been sick today, woke up with Strep and had to find a pharmacy early today to get some meds in me. I think the stress has been getting to me.
So today she came over. She went out and got my meds, which was nice, but neither here nor there. We had a discussion about her taking the boys with her tonight, esp. since I'm sick. I don't want them getting sick. But it was really hard to let her take the boys, esp. since she is taking them to dbag's house. I'm wondering if it will take some wind out of her sails now that I "let" that happen.
We talked a little. She hedges on everything. "I'm not sure if I do want a divorce" and "everyone is telling me to go talk to someone." When I asked her how she plans on paying for her attorney, she said she is going to take money out of one of her 401Ks. I told her that was a terrible idea. I think she is starting to realize the gravity of the situation. She can't afford an apartment. She said she has one picked out (near Dbag's house, I'm sure) but it costs one of her two paychecks per month.
It just seems so stupid to me. She's doing so much damage to her reputation, our marriage, the kids, etc. All for a dbag (and, I discovered today that this is now his second divorce, and he just turned 40. Nice guy).
She said they both informed their bosses at work of their love affair. Not sure what that means to me if anything.
I guess I am feeling like I'm the one stuck with making the decision here. She almost seems pathetic in my mind when I think about how immature she has been being about everything. There's no way she can live on her own. And she's living with dbag now and thinking that that is her only option. She just isn't smart about anything right now.
She said she's seeing her attorney Tuesday, and she's open to collaborative proceedings. Do I wait for her? Or do I quickly put my lawyer on retainer and serve her papers (even after her "thaw" in mood today)?
Confused, and sad about how pathetic her life is right now.
By the way, Merry Christmas to everyone on these forums. I wouldn't be as strong as I am without the help of everyone here. It's always nice to know that other people understand what I am going through. Because most people sure as hell don't!
