Asking for support and advice.

[Norm914]

As far as her Internet activity, you can download a free key logger that will get you some good information.

She's dressing really well now and needs to feel desirable. She had that with OM but did not feel it with me. I think she still needs to feel desirable even if OM is out of picture. How do I get her to feel desirable coming from me and without having to get it from other men?

You mentioned in your response to GIMA that you two had counseling, albeit the destructive kind. Is your W willing to consider MC with a different counselor? If she willing to do more MC, that could eventually open the door to you making her feel more desirable in an honest way, without looking pathetic or manipulative.

You're right. I'm predictable as hell. I've been detaching and I think she has noticed but doesn't trust it. I'm really open to suggestions about becoming mysterious. How do you do that?

Do stuff you’ve never done before (180’s) and DO NOT be forthcoming about what you’re doing. Be very vague. It can be little stuff. You mentioned she sometimes pecks you on the lips. Don’t avail yourself to that. She’s doing that because you look pitiful to her. Avoid it. You behavior is saying, “I’ll take any little crumb of affection I can get”, and she knows it, and you look predictable and weak. Get some attitude, dude! “I don’t need your crumbs! It’s all or nothing with me. If you want me, pursue me.”