Codependents Anonymous offers these patterns and characteristics as a tool to aid in self-evaluation.[1]
Denial Patterns:
* I have difficulty identifying what I am feeling. * I minimize, alter or deny how I truly feel. * I perceive myself as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well being of others.
Low Self Esteem Patterns:
* I have difficulty making decisions. * I judge everything I think, say or do harshly, as never "good enough." * I am embarrassed to receive recognition and praise or gifts. * I do not ask others to meet my needs or desires. * I value others' approval of my thinking, feelings and behavior over my own. * I do not perceive myself as a lovable or worthwhile person.
Compliance Patterns:
* I compromise my own values and integrity to avoid rejection or others' anger. * I am very sensitive to how others are feeling and feel the same. * I am extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long. * I value others' opinions and feelings more than my own and am afraid to express differing opinions and feelings of my own. * I put aside my own interests and hobbies in order to do what others want. * I accept sex when I want love.
Control Patterns:
* I believe most other people are incapable of taking care of themselves. * I attempt to convince others of what they "should" think and how they "truly" feel. * I become resentful when others will not let me help them. * I freely offer others advice and directions without being asked. * I lavish gifts and favors on those I care about. * I use sex to gain approval and acceptance. * I have to be "needed" in order to have a relationship with others.
LOL! Guilty as charged on this one: * I freely offer others advice and directions without being asked.
