Looking for Advice

[gutwrenching]

I got to be honest, a transparency plan is something I am not aware of. Why did she go out w/o me -- probably because she is still so angry at me. She has done this once or twice in years past, so not completely out of character.

She is being very friendly tonight. In fact, she moved her pillow from the guest bedroom to our bed...I'm assuming that means she'll sleep in the bed and I assume that is because she doesn't want the girls to find out and/or she has reconnected with OM.

I think I should monitor for now. To be honest, I'd like to get thru Xmas...I wish I could have held out till the day after Xmas for the confrontation and boundary. I know for a fact she is looking at his facebook account a few times a day and it appears to me to some subliminal communication. She writes on FB "I wish you were here" and he is posting on FB on how he wishes there was snow...

This is just a radical, radical change. She isn't glaring, she is willing to stand next to me, etc.

I have still done better detaching. Tonight she was complaining the dog had been on the couch and it needed vacuumed. I was laying on the other couch with daughter and just kind of looked over at it and ignored. She went and got vacuum and proceeded to take care of it and entire living room and I just watched. A week ago I would have reacted and sprung to help.