For what it’s worth, I read just a few days ago that a marriage stands an 85% better chance of surviving if the details of the affair are discussing. (I can cite the source if you like).
My W still doesn’t know that I know about the A, but I pondered this and it makes sense. If my W eventually does want to come back, I’ve decided that she’ll have to honest about what happened. Without honesty, there can be no real trust. I would want to know, “When did it start? When did it move from an EA to a PA? How often did you see him? When did it end? How/why did it end?” I don’t need the gory details.
If you don’t know this stuff, you’ll go forward always wondering. And isn’t that where we are now – always wondering? That’s no way to heal a relationship much less move forward with it, IMO.
H: 50 W: 48 Married 20 years Bomb and separation: 9/12/09 A discovered 12/02/09 http://tinyurl.com/yctnhec
