Too bad the tattler didn't see my mom there too. I would have told H I was having a threesome with two old people
Seriously LOL'd here. The visual cracks me up. I mean of you telling him, not three waying your parents.
I admire how far you've come and how strong you've gotten. When I first came here, I was in a tizzy. I thought I had an obligation to my marriage and my kids to do whatever I could to save it. Now I realize, I only have an obligation to save myself.
Last edited by Sad Girl; 12/23/0911:29 PM. Reason: I never learn, do I?
I used to think I would NEVER date a man with kids. Ever. Period. It would not be my first choice but I do realize at my age (34, almost 35) I might have to rethink that stance.
I love children and hope to be a mother one day so it's not the idea of children that turn me off. It is the idea of somebody else's YOUNG children that frightens me. I guess for me it would be on a "case by case basis".
My friend went through a nasty divorce this year. Her and I always joke when we start dating somebody we will request a copy of their divorce decree to be sure they are really divorced, a copy of their credit report and a criminal background check, lol!
H was over visting the kids for about 3 hours. I told him I wasn't leaving while he visited, mostly because I was paranoid that he would say something crazy to the kids. He said he didn't expect me to leave. This is a change from 2 months ago when he expected me to be out while he visited.
He absolutely thinks I have an OM. He asked me for names, told me he had been checking around, asked me about something 3 years ago, etc. He also told me again that he didn't approve of the kids being around OM. I just stood there laughing, so he said my body language was telling him that I had a man. He also said that he thought I have had a man since before we were separated !!!
I do not have one, and I have not had one. I said to him, why do you care? He said he didn't, he just cared about how it impacted the kids. I said I could do what I wanted with whoever I wanted. I didn't deny it, but I think I looked guilty.
Why does he care if I have the kids around OM? Does he actually think I would put them in harms way?
I'm starting to think the man who does not get jealous is a little worried I've met someone. Serves him right!
Apparently you've been getting a life and acting mysterious to the point that he assumes something is up. Fear of loss is crisis, people react and change during these times, allow him to squirm with the knowledge that you're moving on - what else have you done aside from this that has him asking questions and being interested in you?
I'm meeting someone at a military base this weekend and he assumes it's a man. Plus, my phone never stopped the whole time he was here. He assumed I was talking to OM.
I was thinking I need to tell him where I am going, with who, and why.
When he said he didn't want the kids at some guys house, I should have said something. I just looked at him like he was nuts.
I'm meeting someone at a military base this weekend and he assumes it's a man. Plus, my phone never stopped the whole time he was here. He assumed I was talking to OM.
I was thinking I need to tell him where I am going, with who, and why.
When he said he didn't want the kids at some guys house, I should have said something. I just looked at him like he was nuts.
You don't need to tell him where you are going, who you are with and what you are doing.
The mystery is what has him asking questions and being interested.
Think about the basic tenets of human nature:
- We usually don't appreciate what we have. - We usually don't appreciate what we have until it's gone - We want what we don't have - We want what we don't have especially if someone else has what we don't have - We rebel against that which tries to control us - We attribute value to things in high demand (if everyone could step outside their home and grab a handful of perfect, flawless diamonds in our flowerbeds they probably wouldn't be worth alot of money
When your husband had you, he didn't appreciate what he had.
If he thinks that someone else is interested in you, think about what this does in his head: I had her, didn't want her, let her go, now someone else wants her, someone else might have her now, did I make a mistake, did I let go of something valuable, is she something valuable, maybe I want what I had back....
Hence the interest, hence the crappy attitude, the questions, the curiousity.
Don't tell him anything, don't satisfy his curiousity, continue doing what you're doing, watch him ask more questions, watch him become more interested ;-)
