Looking for Advice

[gutwrenching]

Thank you, Thank you Sandi. I had decided that if I was going to insist on FB that it would be after Christmas. I will use your words unless I or someone else has something better. I nicely but firmly say that "no contact means not reading his FB" and yes there is way to block access, both ways.

My radar is up on high right now. This morning, she was still raging mad at me. At work, it was time to give out some Christmas gifts. She sent me a text asking if I wanted to go with her or not. I said I did, not because of her, but because it was the right thing to do for our mutual friends and boss. We arranged a time to give out the gifts and I went to her office. She was cordial, not surprised because this is the public front, but more cordial than I thought. After handing out gifts, she slides into a side room in the building we were in and I say to myself, fine, I sure as heck don't need to wait around to walk back with her. I start telling everyone goodbye and she immediately pops out and asks if I am leaving and I say yes and she heads out with me. Odd. Maybe the public front again of the happy couple.
We have a dare I say friendly conversation on the walk back despite no one being around, a little about work and then about our kids and who is going to relieve the nanny and when tonight. I tell her I am leaving early, I am going to the gym and then I have some xmas shopping to finish up, but I can be home by 5. She said I thought we were done xmas shopping and I told her I needed stocking stuffers for her. She shook her head no. I told her that for one because of the kids, she wasn't going to have an empty stocking and two, regardless of how much she hates me right now, I wasn't going to allow an empty stocking on Christmas. She replied I don't hate you, I am very angry at the our situation right now. I only replied well I'm not too pleased with where we are at right now either. I asked when she was going home and she said she didn't know, but had some plans for some fitness activities in the afternoon if she could break away and I said good. I meant it. she needs to figure things out, getting away from me and everything and working out is good...and I realize it could drive her to deciding to go deeper undercover, but I can't stop that. She has to figure it out.

Not ANGRY?!?!?! I've never seen anyone so angry in my life. I've never been treated so coldly by another human being in my life. That comment has me perplexed.