Hey guys, just checking in.....Things are going pretty well....The boys are with me this week and we are doing alot of hunting so I am staying busy.....We are going in a minute to buy their mom a present.....I remember last year how that tore me up...This year I am actually not feeling too bad about it.....
I will be going to her house Christmas Eve night to be with boys and do santa with her.....It did not turn out very well last year, but I am determined to make things go smooth this year....I don't know what it is, but I just feel more at peace about things....
Yesterday, she spent the day with my mom, who is seriouly ill...She wrapped presents for her and cleaned her house....My mom really enjoyed seeing her.....It almost seemed like old times....Of course, when she went home, OM was there waiting on her.....I think I am beginning to realize what a hold he has on her and how impossible this situation is.......That is really not a bad thing, because I have had my hopes so high at times....I am beginning to face reality and hopefully starting to move on.....What else can I do?
I spoke last night with the woman I had been seeing....She called to check on me and to talk to the boys.....I am beginning to truly see the love this woman has for me......I'm not sure if my ex or anyone else has ever loved me like this.....I'm not jumping back into anything because I know I am nowhere near ready.....As a good friend told me the other day, the only thing wrong with her is that she is not my ex......That hit hard and I have thought alot about that.....She has been put in a terrible spot and is doing all she can do to let me get through this....
Anyway, I am feeling better and taking one day at a time....Where this goes, I have no idea.....I am just tired of being consumed by this and have been praying that God is going to guide me in the right direction......
