What GIMA said. Sometimes, there is just too much left unspoken even after your fingers are worn to the bone from typing anyway. Speaking for myself, that's why I hang around here at times, you read flashes of your own life in others.

As for what smartcookie posted, deja vu again. Sounds like something I went through for the first 3 paras. Erect the barriers so that life goes on, and you don't rock the boat though you may be unhappy. Difference is that W felt the barriers, started putting up some too, was also unhappy. And ended up plunging into a fantasy with OM.

Dealing with that resentment (which is entirely separate from the actual A itself) has been one of the most difficult things I ever attempted.

Me 42
W 39
Married: 11 Jan 1998, T: Since 1992
First Bomb: Sep 2007
Confirmed A/OM: 4 Nov 2007
Kids: D10, S5
Reconciled and together again after (alot of) time and heartbreak.
3rd kid, S, born 2 Jan 2010.