She had dinner read to serve, when I walked in. I complemented and thanked her for that. She has said that she shows me she loves me by doing things for me, such as cooking dinner and having it ready when I get home.
Make a mental note of this: MOST people try to express their love for someone in the same way that *they* would like to receive it. Physically affectionate folks want to give AND receive physical affection. "Act of service" folks want to do things for others and feel loved when things are done for them.
She just told you her #1 love language -- although you probably figured that out, right?
-- Jim
P.S.: and as the Love Language book also states, one key to a successful relationship falls into place when both partners stop trying to speak to their partner in their own, personal Love Language (LL), and instead work to speak in their *partner's* LL. It takes work to get there, however: in general, people tend to very stubbornly insist that *their* own LL is supreme ("Why can't s/he be like ME!?").
Last edited by Bagheera; 12/23/0912:03 AM.
Me 50, W 45, M for 26 yrs S25, D23, S13, S10 20+ year SSM; recovery began Oct 2007
