Just gotta share something positive, because unfortunately that has been too rare for too long and it feels good to share...
Last night H and I had a good talk where he discussed some of the fears and discouragements he had been battling for a while before the A, how he can see now that the A was not the "answer" to those things it seemed to be at the time... I did some of the DB skills of listening and validating his feelings. H paused and said... "How can you handle this with so much grace and compassion?" I answered, "I'm not sure, but I think that's part of what real love is all about." H nodded and said, "I would give anything to back up the clock a year and undo all this." I just said, "I wish you could do that too." This morning, after H left for work, he sent me a text saying, "30 years from now we will be sitting together and having quite the stories to tell of what we have overcome in our M" Wow.... I guess he is truly re-commiting.... Very encouraging. As much as I'm still struggling with all of my hurt and pain and anger (which he knows), there is a lot of healing that happens for both of us with some of those words.
