Pls help--confused and fearful

[Day by Day]

I love you guys. Thanks so much for the support. I really mean it.

I don't recall telling the board about the probs in M. I think I'll get to it soon if I feel like it. I haven't filed anything yet. I rescheduled the appt for after new years.

I'm thinking that no jolt will wake up my WAS.

I can't go for full custody in my state, but I want them as much as possible. He can't really be with them much anyway because he travels a lot.

Thanks for the positive spin on my future newmama. Yes, I am very excited about my new career. I'm even starting to apply for jobs now. I want a new life. I'm tired of this pain and sadness.

I have been feeling that I'm not getting many responses on my thread because others feel my sitch is hopeless. I've tried to find any little thing to give me hope or a direction to go in.

I may have to try to go pitch dark and hopefully I'll be like a black hole and suck him back in. I mean you are right P, nothing I've done has worked so far. What else can I do?

I'm on the fence about wanting to R the M. I'm feeling very resentful for what he's done. I was so willing to forgive but he didn't want it. I'm just about to give up... it won't take much more.