WAW on suicide watch, what now???

[MHL]

Accidently hit submit to soon. I would say overall the dinner was a little uneasy but okay. I would say my W was not as relaxed as I would have liked her to be but the fact that my D13 agreed to be there with her at the same table was big accomplishment of the night. My SIL is still coming to visit my W on Christmas Eve, so unless that changes, my W will not come over on Christmas Eve b/c she knows how I feel about SIL and also D13 is not happy with SIL either. I wish all the extended family would leave us alone this Christmas so we can start to heal as a family. Even S9 wants it to be just the "family" on Christmas. Probably W will be there for a couple of hours on Christmas day and will return to her "rented" room to spend the rest of the day with her sister. I know she is going to want to take S9 back with her when she leaves. I will have to suck it up on this one and say okay which would be a 180 for me. I am just concerned what to do if my S9 does not want to go, which I am sure he will not b/c he will want to play with all the new toys and play with friends etc. He will have had his "fill" of Mommmy and will want to stay at home. Of course I would like it if my W would come over Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, my DB coach even suggested that if the opportunity presented itself on Christmas Eve that I ML with my W no strings attached. I don't think that would happen anyway but it was an ego boost for someone else think that it might be a possibility.
All the contact with my W is difficult on both of us but I feel like as long as I am not pursuing her and being positive and happy when I am around her she will be more and more comfortable around me. After Christmas though I will need to let her initiate the next time we are together, I already know that will be a big test for me, I imagine it might be weeks before she would ask me to do something with her.