Deployed Soldier/Father needs your help

[MichelleLT]

She's putting the kids in the middle.

Don't go along with it. Don't ask for info from them. Don't tell them things. Be strong for them.

Sounds like you need to have a talk with them, individually. Something along the lines of they don't have to choose, they are your kids, you will love them always. And be extra careful from now on about what they see and hear. Especially your oldest it sounds like.

You are in control of you. She is in control of her. And the kids are in control of themselves. Especially your oldest since he is old enough to feel justified in making his own decisions.

You can only control you and your reactions.

Use this as a chance to show them how a man acts. Use this as a chance to talk to them and forge a closer bond with them if you can.