how to 180 when you've been too independent?

[avermont]

Hi all-

Wow, a lot of input to digest. I'm not good at pulling out the quotes yet, so let me try to see if I can respond to newmama:

---Angry at posters for the advice they offer?
No--absolutely not! Apologies all around if I came across that way. I appreciate everything everyone is offering in the way of advice and support.

----Yup, Puppy and Cutterbug scolded me for chasing.
I appreciated their input.

---Doubting word gets around?
----I don't doubt that Puppy knows what he's talking about. I just can't imagine--in my own limited imagination--anyone really going up to X and saying: hey! Av is such and such! I haven't experienced that going the other way, or with other couples that have broken up.

---Naming names.
------I was quoting and citing sources--is it not the thing to do on this forum to say "so and so suggested such and such?" If that is bad form, I won't do it again.

So--newmama--thank you for your critiques. I don't want to come across as angry or not appreciative. Apologies all around if I have done so.

I like both newmama's suggestion that I DO let X know that I will be away for the week: mystery; asking for help; also plus just being a responsible landlord. But then I also liked Cutterbug's argument, to just take care of the tenants as we usually do (which is just giving them all contact and emergency info) and not saying anything to X about going away. Keeps the NC going more.

So--you see--conflicted as always, but truly taking to heart suggestions and pondering what feels right--or as Coach says--what feels MOST uncomfortable, and do that!

Now I want to check in on pearlharbr and see how her skiing trip is going--