WAW and 4 kids

[tryingtilDorR]

W has been pretty quiet/brooding the past few days. I was reflecting on some more of the interaction from 4 days ago. She is kind of wacky so I don't put a lot into what she says when she is emotional, but I thought this was interesting. Most of the time I ignore her crap, but I couldn't resist this one the other day (note I have still not told W directly that I called OM's quasi-GF but she knows from OM):

W: the only way you could have known about OM's affair with ZZZZ is if you called the mother of OM's child (quasi-GF). How could you do such a thing?

TDR: Tell OM if he is feeling sorry for himself and looking for someone to blame to look in the mirror and think about what he is doing with the mothers of other people's children.

W: You have no clue what you are talking about. He has nothing to feel bad about. He didn't do anything but be a good friend to me.


She also, on the same day, told me to make a mediation appointment so we can 'find out what our rights are with a separation'. I told her that mediation goal is to come up with a divorce settlement, not a separation agreement and that you file for D early in the mediation process and then work to come to a final agreement.

For whatever reason she never uses the word Divorce. In all of her comments/conversation she always talks about separation. I think she would like to take the next step in her single life, which is have her own house but still stay M on paper so she can remain on my health insurance (she doesn't get any with her job). Her goal all along seems to be to live apart but have me pay her a lot assuming she continues to only work 2 days/week, but also to NOT get a Divorce.

Contacting OM's GF was an untried item on my 'do something different' list and now I can check that off. I am still waiting to observe more potential fallout from that, good or bad. In my situation I figured I don't have much to lose so it can't do damage (!)