"The more I reflect, the more I think it was just residual sadness and the memories of the past that hit me. How ugly it was. "
Maybe you are finding a little gentleness and compassion for yourself. Sadness for the very, very hurt Mish in the car... Understanding her pain, wanting to comfort her, no way to do so. Except you can tell her inside yourself what you wish she'd known then, and give her a hug.
Really. Yeah, I know, sappy. But we need compassion for ourselves just as much as we need it for others, if not more. Understanding our own pain, our own weaknesses, our own faults lets us forgive ourselves, and then extend compassion and forgiveness to others.
Heck! Even my X seems to be emotional and on edge. Unfortunately it seems the kids get to be in the focus when it happens. Some of it is them, acting their age. Interestingly, I wonder if she misses having someone else to blame when things don't got perfectly her way!
Last edited by Virtually_Handsome; 12/20/0907:46 AM.
OT - I am sitting here crying reading your sweet post. That was so spot on. It wasn't a lot of feeling sorry for myself, but more feeling the past hurt like it was fresh. You are right, there is a need to feel compassion for ourselves without it turning into self-pity.
((((((((((BBJ))))))))))))))))))))) - No crying today right? Only joy and happiness allowed this week!
Jeff, that is so interesting that your xw is emotional. In descriptions of her she has always seemed like a completely cold, unemotional person. It's unfortunate the kids get the brunt of it but wonderful that she doesn't have you to take it out on anymore.
I missed the early service at church today and I have so much to do this afternoon that I guess I'm missing the late service too. This Christmas candy isn't going to make itself. Marc was supposed to help me yesterday and, as usual, found a way to not be here when I needed him to be. Like I've said before, I find it difficult to tell him he can't go to a friend's house since he doesn't get invited that often.
*sigh* - he already had plans for today so he won't be here to help again. I could really use a candy stirrer.....any volunteers?
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Oh, I know how sometimes the unexpected just sneaks up on you...((((hugs))))
Hope the candy-making made things better! I don't think I would take something like that on this time of year, myself - I'll stick to decorating sugar cookies.
Did you see that the new Wii Fit expansion is only $20...?
Well, the candy making didn't happen. I have to do it ALL tomorrow!!!! YIKE! My own fault though...I got myself too involved in other stuff.
Donna - The Wii Fit actually came with the plus already so it's all covered! Thanks! It is so much fun and such a great workout. Loving it!
Michelle - wish you lived closer too girl! I really need the help and it would be so much fun to spend time with someone that is so fun loving and full of energy!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!