Quote: guess I am just licking my wounds and feeling hurt. And it does hurt a lot.
You bet it does. And you need to take some time to 'lick your wounds.' It's normal. Don't beat yourself up over it.
Quote: I feel that she likes my subtle sexual hints and innuendos and the physical contacts (foot rubs, back rubs, neck rubs, holding hands, hugs, etc) but when it start getting her worked up some she will pull away while telling me that she enjoyed it. I wonder if she wants me to really pursue her?
From what you've written, it sounds like your XW is going through a lot of mental, emotional and physical changes right now and it doesn't suprise me that one days she's one way and the next day, another.
From reading your other messages *I* think the goals you've set for yourself and for piecing the R back together are good ones. Just don't get sidetracked. If she does't contact you today or tomorrow, she's probably doing as you are: licking her wounds.
You've done so well, so far. And you do have a reason to contact her, letting her know you will be at the house while she's gone.
