now, is your H being the H you fully want right now? of course not. he's not going to just all the sudden be a new man. This takes time girl, and if you want to have a wonderful relationship with him, then please please stop the high expectations. You have to stop expecting perfect behavior from him.
In regards to my own H, he still isn't everything I want..but who can be? there is no way that I am everything he wants, but he loves me and wants me and I the same for him, and we work together on the things that we mess up on.
BUT, you guys are far from being in that position yet.
and that includes you too. The worst thing that you can do to help save your M is to be bitter, and not open your eyes to the RIGHT things he is doing.
even if you have to look with a microscope, you have to focus on the positive things and stop trying to expect more, or focusing on everything bad he's done. or 4Luv will be right, that you will sabotage your own M.
now, I will say, that I don't think that night was entirely bad, BECAUSE you stayed calm, you didn't cry, or were mad. you just stated how you felt, and then you listened to him. even though the timing on bringing up the R talk wasn't good, you didn't mess it up IMHO.
you know what else...whoever talked about the food thing, and the drinks... this needs to be a priority for you right now. Do you realize that people who are malnurished will find themselves depressed, and unable to function in their head right. I really think you need to start forcing yourself to eat well, continue with any exercise your doing, and you'll start noticing some changes in your mood and your sleep.
And in the meantime, please keep praying for your bitterness to go away, and really try to do something different when you have these bitter thoughts. please do this for you, not just for him.
can you list some things right now that can help you distract yourself from these thoughts, and then use these ideas to help you.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
