Positive developments? #2

[jon2911]

when did your W's parents divorce?

She was a sophomore in high school, so that would be 1999. Their M appeared perfect right up to the bomb. All 3 kids chose to stay with their dad, unusual and interesting. FIL re-married within a year, after promising W he wouldn't until she was in college. This is still a very sore spot.

Also, when did your wife's health problems first begin?

Around that time. They got progressively worse through college and into our M. She's also had several concussions, which add head injury pain but don't cause her migraines, according to the doctors. One concussion was an accident we had a week before our wedding, which FIL uses to blame the health problems on me.

MIL told me that W refuses help and will not let things go. "If you're going to be married to her, you'll have to figure out how to help her, because she won't let you." Still haven't figured out how.

Also, could you say a bit about how your FIL responded (and coped with) your MIL's death?

That was definitely twilight zone time. She died of cancer which she'd battled for 10 years. From her deathbed she asked him to come see her, and he refused. SIL stayed with her mom during this time in the hospital and told us this. We'd been married 4 months, and didn't know how to help her through it all.

One final question - you mentioned your BIL but say you haven't met him - I'm a bit puzzled - is this your W's brother (and son of your FIL)? If so what's the relationship like between BIL and FIL?

That's interesting. They got married a year ago (which is why I haven't met him). They live in New York. FIL boycotted the wedding because he didn't approve of BIL. He pulled similar crap with our wedding, but eventually came.

Thanks for reading, River, and thanks for the support!