All 3 times I have said no. Adding up in my head what he pays exw1, me, and then the cel phones and orthdontist for his other kids it is now almost 2/3 of his paycheck. He started struggling more when exw1 made him pay for the ortho and phones. Long run he isn't going to make it if this keeps up.
okay, well, you mentioned him working for her family. that's a tough one and makes much more sense now, but totally unfair to you.
just keep saying no every time no matter what unless something crazy happens like he loses a limb or something. have you mentioned "are you required to pay the kids' cell phones? could you ask to hold off on those?" not sure that's a great idea, but why is he paying unless it's court ordered (although it is a nice thing he's doing, but it's unfair to expect you to skip a payment because of it)?
the other thing is, he's made a choice to be here, so if that's the amounts the courts have chosen, then he has to deal with it. But I can understand how that would be really frustrating for him.
So is he still running 1 payment behind? Well, this is what I would do. you do what you feel is right though.
because he keeps being late, it can cause some unneeded stress on you because I'm sure you use it to pay some bills. I would tell him that you want to talk sometime...I would wait till after holidays. and talk to him, tell him you understand that it is difficult for him, and thank him for paying. (it could be WAY worse) and tell him that in 2010 you need for him to be caught up and pay by this date. You believe that he will prove to be reliable but you want to do the best for D and make sure she has everything she needs without having any extra stress. If he can make the payments by this date that is wonderful, but your atty feels that if they can't be made on time that the best thing is to arrange it with the courts, so it can be done automatically and with less stress on everyone.
that's a really hard one to word in a positive way though.
hey, what does he do with first exW? has he always paid check or is it thru the courts? or I guess they could just take it out when they pay him huh.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
