Partner left after 9 yrs - 18months on, reunited !

[AliSuddenly]

So last night he said he is sad and unhappy all the time. He knows he has everything to be glad about, but he feels no enjoyment. He appreciates me, our life together and everything I do for him, but he cant feel it and knows he should appreciate it more. He said he has negative thoughts all the time and you cant tell what thoughts other people have, but he feels there is something wrong with him, that he is a lunatic.

He said he doesnt want to ML, not at all. He cant explain why. He said he loves me and wants to be with me, his unhappiness isnt to do with me. He said he clings onto his feelings for me like a lifeline, I am his focal point. He said he feels like there is something in his head, a block, like he wishes someone could just unlock or unblock it..I got the impression theres more to it but he wont open up.

I never wanted to be a rescuer, but I gave in and booked him a doctors appointment tonight. I also arranged counselling for us in Jan (and then we can see her separately if thats advised). I need help with this.

Sigh.