This manipulative cr*p around his snowboarding trip sounds like a dealbreaker. You can't go on living like this anyhow = like roommates - so why not use this as your entree discussion.
Something like : "If you want to continue to live here, you will do so as a responsible father and husband. No coming and going and making plans without talking it over with me. If you want to do whatever you want, then I expect you to move out and let me get on with my life."
