Calling out the Piecers

[Freckle6]

Yeah, that makes sense, but surely she has to realize that she may need to keep her opinions to herself on this topic or risk your relationship. I guess I would try saying to her, "I love you and I can't begin to thank you for all the ways you've been there for me over the years, but I need to see if I can put my family back together and try to give my kids back the kind of stable home I didn't have. I know you're worried about all this because you care about me and want me to be happy. I do appreciate that, but right now I'm doing what I feel I need to do." Of course putting in grunty man phrases.

This past spring my baby brother (I'm 9 years older so I almost feel like his mother too) decided he made a mistake getting married the year before. He asked if he could stay with me for a bit. I told him that if he was expecting me to say, "oh, do whatever makes you happy", he wasn't going to get it, but that if he needed a place to stay that I had room here. I made my opinion known that I firmly believed that you don't walk out on a marriage for the hell of it, whether it's been 9 months or 9 years or 59 years.

I made it known that I did not approve when I found out he had a "friend" who also happened to be married and had small children. But I didn't continually beat him over the head about it even though my tongue had constant bite marks in it. I even had to bite my tongue yesterday when, after finding out that my H and I have been "talking", when he told me to be careful because he (meaning my H) left so easily the first time. I was thinking, um, shouldn't that be what I need to say to *your* girlfriend. The one you walked out on your 9 month old marriage for? Or maybe I should be warning you about her since she doens't seem to like sticking around for the long haul either. Instead I just deleted that text and pretended I never saw it. Just like he's a grown-up and will do what he wants to do, so will I. You want me to talk to your cousin about biting her tongue and just smiling at you?