This is going to make me sound like a Grinch, but I don't see this plan working well.
He is completely ensconced in the affair fog. When I tried to be nice to BF while he was heavy in the affair fog it just pushed him further away.
I am a strong believer in taking a hard stand. Why would you want to go out of your way to be nice to someone who has treated you so poorly? As I told BF, I wouldn't tolerate a friend treating me with such disrespect so why should I accept that from him? And more importantly, why do you want to chase after someone who doesn't want you?
I would show up looking fabulous, get straight to business, treat it strictly as a business meeting, then flash a winning smile as you're leaving and saying, "Oh, I didn't realize the time. I hate to keep people waiting! See ya."
That's just my opinion. Because I know that I'm worth more than being treated like crap. And because it worked.
And before you start in yet again with "I was too independent" I don't believe that for one minute. You were a strong independent woman when you met BF and started dating. If he didn't like those traits he never would have gotten together with you in the first place. He is rewriting history to justify his affair and he got you to buy it hook, line and sinker.
Do you have commitment and intimacy issues? Absolutely. And you are right to work on those. But that doesn't mean you should turn into a damsel in distress, especially because that isn't really you.
Were on the same page pearl.... :)http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/images/icons/default/lightbulb.gif
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
