Do the MB people see the "abuse" as verbal or something? And yeah...there are plenty of WS who act like jerks and snap at BSs! It's called blameshifting!
Good idea not to call again but I think it was okay that you reached out for the sake of his mom. Right? Or were you talking about the phone bill?
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
I am not sure if his "verbal abuse" is so different from other WH's - he is for sure manipulative - he is always the victim - but he was always like that - just not that much
Did you ever notice that people don't get the your story when you tell it or trying to play it down?
Yes. And people generally don't care!
A's are so common today it's hard to find a married person who either hasn't had one or doesn't have a friend who's had one.
I blame the 'fast food' culture - instant gratification on everything. I also blame the West's attitude to laziness - nobody wants to work for anything these days - including a M - it's easier just to move on to the next bit of excitement.
There are few people left who see the important in a good healthy M.
Sorry, hijacked the thread and ranted a little
Me 36, W 34 | D 8 | M 3.5y Sep 2Aug09 | Left 6Sep09 | OM in 10Oct09 | NC 17Nov09 | Gave up caring - Jan 2010
"Have integrity. Do what is right, not what is expedient." "Delay is the antidote for anger"
I get so frustrated talking to people - I think I just stop from now on I think
The only solution that I have come up with is to carry around one of those extendable batons the Police use and whack them upside the head when the start dissin' what I'm sayin (no idea where that came from ... sorry!).
Apparently though, that's called assault ... who'd figure!
It is very frustrating trying to let these people know you want to fight for your M and all you want to do is have support, not a fight as to why you're 'such a doormat'. Baton, anybody?
Me 36, W 34 | D 8 | M 3.5y Sep 2Aug09 | Left 6Sep09 | OM in 10Oct09 | NC 17Nov09 | Gave up caring - Jan 2010
"Have integrity. Do what is right, not what is expedient." "Delay is the antidote for anger"
WAH just texted me to say that MIL's operation went well - I am so relieved - for now anyway He will be flying in on Tuesday - I am not expecting too much for the few days to be honest - I have the turkey and ham ordered - he is welcome if he wants to join us but i won't ask again - it's up to him now. I actually find it interesting that I am now making different decisions then when we were together - small things but still - white lights instead of coloured ones on the tree, I ordered a proper turkey instead of boned and rolled i.e.
WS starts acting distant, moody. They may be picking on the BS. They seem to put up a wall.WS says things like ILYBINILWY, why did we get married, do you ever think you could be happier with someone else, what do we have in common anymore, etc.They rewrite the marriage history.WS asks for a separation to "sort things out" and have some space.
WS suddenly has a new lover--whoa, how did they meet in 4 days? THEY DIDN'T.
This is exactly what happened in my case but I am still hoping that the woman I found after 6 days was not "the OW" because that would mean he would have left us after just having an EA at least - it would lower my opinion of him even more. Who leaves his kids for a woman he has only an EA with??? I mean come on - let's just hope there is more to my story then this.
don't worry