Summer!??!??!?!? Shoot it was -1 degrees here today! Hence, the hat, fur and boots! And, the ONE item I had on my xmas list... a remote start for my car... H tells me is not MADE for my MAKE/MODEL of card! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
IF they are so f'n miserable that they have HAD or are HAVING a PA/EA, whatever kind of A you can name..., then WHY HIDE IT!?!?!?! Why be afraid to be found out? Why lie? Why cover it up? If you're miserable, and you've found someone else, isn't that reason enough to be done w/the marriage and move the F on!?!?!!
great question mind...
and since I've been on both sides, I'll answer why for myself.
because I wanted it to be my H that was doing all the things the OM was doing.
also, because people are lost and confused. going to the other person doesn't really make them happy...it just gives them this temporary high. it's truly like a drug.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
I don't want to love someone who purposely hurts me and doesn't care about my feelings. That's why I am so sad lately.
Are you sure that he is bent on purposefully hurting you?
Is is perhaps possible that he has NO IDEA how to please you?
EDIT: One final question...
Is it possible that your actions are PUSHING him away because he feels rejected by you?
had to repost this. I believe this has a lot to do with whats going on.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
That's what has kept me from having affairs all this time. I had the sense to know not to go near it (the drug) because in the end...no matter what...it is Destructive!
I just wasn't willing to risk missing my H - and I knew I would.
this is in response to ST's drug comment.
Last edited by luvless; 12/16/0911:19 PM.
M44 H41 M20 T23 3 older teens Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy" EA Nov 09 w/coworker Another PA in Mar 10 I Filed Apr 10 D final Dec 10
Thank you for that Bridge - It's my H way of getting me back - hurting me and yes, I believe when he acts like this (mean and distant) it's on purpose.
yes, because he feels hurt. and it could just be that he hurts himself, but I like G mentioning the triggers.
what triggers are there that you do that causes him to react in a positive way?? do more of those!
hey, and why DIDN'T you jump all over him the other night??? that could have gotten some good responses from him!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Summer!??!??!?!? Shoot it was -1 degrees here today! Hence, the hat, fur and boots! And, the ONE item I had on my xmas list... a remote start for my car... H tells me is not MADE for my MAKE/MODEL of card! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
that sucks!!! that is the best gift I've ever gotten..but you know what, the dumb fob thing keeps letting the batteries fall out and they short circuit, so the thing doesn't always work and I'm wasting money on batteries...soooo
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
luv, I'm glad that you are beyond and aware of the traps of infidelity. not many people are.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Thank you for that Bridge - It's my H way of getting me back - hurting me and yes, I believe when he acts like this (mean and distant) it's on purpose.
yes, because he feels hurt. and it could just be that he hurts himself, but I like G mentioning the triggers.
that I "trigger" the hurt in him??
what triggers are there that you do that causes him to react in a positive way?? do more of those!
right now I just don't know - he is cold and distant.
hey, and why DIDN'T you jump all over him the other night??? that could have gotten some good responses from him!
Probably fear of rejection - he is mad at me - I'm sure he woulda said he was tired.
Last edited by luvless; 12/16/0911:22 PM. Reason: oh gawd..gotta learn how to do these quotes!!!
M44 H41 M20 T23 3 older teens Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy" EA Nov 09 w/coworker Another PA in Mar 10 I Filed Apr 10 D final Dec 10
