I am not sure the best way to explain this phenomenon, but it is all too common. People in our little town would never believe the things Dan has done, but I won't tell them anyway, it isn't their business!
Although two of my male cousins told me a couple weeks ago (at my other cousin's 30th bday party, so they were inebriated!) "You know, Dan always kind of seemed like a d!ck. Like he thought he was better than us. And no offense but you kind of pulled away from the family when you were together. We missed you and we're glad to have you back"...
So sometimes, the changes can wind up being for the better, for us, even if we don't like the process...
