feel like giving up - talk to me!

[luvless]

Last night wasn't so bad. I kept it together. H came in and wasn't very nice but he did seem interested in what I was doing. (ding ding...goes off in my head) is he wondering what I'm doing...what I might know?

He looks at what I'm doing on my laptop and asks, "what are you looking at?" I said, "nothing," I smiled and read my DB. He sat down on couch like whatever. He did mention he didn't care.

I went to bed and he came in shortly after. No goodnight - as usual. I so wanted to have mad sex with him after a while lying there...what was I thinking? I forgot I don't like this man right now! This morning he was really quiet but then said, "you're acting weird." I still say he is wondering don't you?

He responded to my text this text this morning "you know what's funny...I'm not doing anything. So my conscience is clean." Remember...I called him on "messing around" and that I would do whatever it took to protect myself and find out.

Yesterday was a sad day...today I'm feeling a little angry.